university

soo, another week hm.. time is just passing by these days :-} Feels like I'm gonna be 30 soon =D no, quite some time left ;-) Could at least drive my toyota to härnösand this time, much better than my mothers driving carton how people use to call her nissan micra =P

Inger was not at home this week so I had the flat for myself. But much to do anyway so no time to be bored I have to say =) Was glad to meet my studymates again and you are more motivated with every time you are here =) the problem is just the weeks inbetween =P

So yeah whats new? not much, a lot to do as always and still intresting, even though i was not that motivated the week before but you all have times like that =) reading/math learning, some funny lectures and chats, expensive food and sun ;-)

On wednesday did we have a workshop where we could create material to increase and help the learing of language, the understanding of the context.

annas biggest fear? =P

 Today we had to entertain a group of children, well ok, we teached them something =P about the old ways of math, how the romans, egyptian and so on, we dressed up like them and showed them, really funny =)

 

coffee (well, tea and cookie) break ;)

And math at the second part of the week, always a pleasure these days ;) still impressed that the mathteacher knew my name from kinda the second day he met all of us, and we are about 80 students =O

Ok then, last lectures tomorrow untill 12.00 and then its time to travel homewards again, with my toyota ;) Will even take Maria with me up to Umeå, so company half the way =)

this weeks quote by my studymate theres: "is she still alive?" "no i dont think so, this was in the 70ies" =D

Oh here a few pics from my photoshoot in umeå last month, sooo many pics actually, but dont feel like uploading them all and some are not really something I want to share with the world wide web ;-)

ready?

Ok then, 3weeks later its time for university again, havent really done everything but i have still some time left ;-) weekend was calm, even greger came home inbetween his work so i could spend the weekend with him as well :-) otherwise i watched idol with popcorn and ice-cream with ricke and his family, met ida and tried to fokus on my work but didnt really feel like it, you really can see that we had way too long summervacation :-P left spike with johanna and gabbe now, will one last time this weekend play taxi for becca and then i'll leave ;-)

Hope this week is motivating enough untill the next week in härnösand ;-) at least math is pretty much fun these days :-P

See ya!

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lost dog

A friend of mine found this dog on thursday, he suddenly was sitting outside his house barking. Totally freezing and hungry, could walk much more, he was probably running around in the orrest for days :-( but after calling the police and trying to find the owner did he finally called yesterday evening :-) the dog obviously disappeared while hunting (its hunting season here right now) but i am glad that he found his family again :-)

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i wanna grow old with you..

Another day
Without your smile
Another day just passes by
But now I know
How much it means
For you to stay
Right here with me

The time we spent apart will make our love grow stronger
But it hurt so bad I can't take it any longer

I wanna grow old with you
I wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you

A thousand miles between us now
It causes me to wonder how
Our love tonight remains so strong
It makes our risk right all along

The time we spent apart will make our love grow stronger
But it hurt so bad I can't take it any longer

I wanna grow old with you
I wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you

Things can come and go I know but
Baby I believe
Something's burning strong between us
Makes it clear to me

I wanna grow old with you
I wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you

Westlife

no time for thoughts..

oh boy, have actually so much to do for university, do not even really have time for anything else at all.. but still am I sitting here most of the time thinking about everything possible.. A lot of things around me and other people are happening, a lot of things and deep discussions to talk about. Not only negative though ;-)

Talked about life and love these days, relationship and demands, the meaning of life and love and everything around.. really deep discussions, some easy questions, but really difficult answers. Especially love.. but it has always been like this, through all this times did people try to define love and to find the line where do you begin to call it love, or why it sometimes ends so fast..

Thinking a lot about the future as well, see all my friends around me going more and more in this family life, this serious relationships; engagement, babies, weddings.. kinda cool :-} To have found someone you love and who loves you feels good. Feels good to be special, feels good that it feels right. I feel so good with it and it feels like something that wont just last some months, and I mean this one year is alreday pretty much. At least at my age is it still a long time.Even if you use to be carefull after having been through certain things, doesnt matter if you've been through it yourself or have seen close friends or others going through it..But sometimes you just have to take a risk, a risk of beeing hurt or rejected..?
But looking at us do I have to say that it feels great. Feels like I fall in love more and more with each day, he makes me feel so good and he makes me feel that its us, and not just like some sort of game, something nice to pass time with. we started dating around a year ago and it kind of feels secure that he started to talk about our future and kids already a while ago :) Some circumstances and other things dont make it possible yet, and I actually think that having a baby after a year or being engaged by now could be too soon, even if he said that I wouldnt have denied an engagementring by now and yeah, probably not ;-) But it feels good anyway, especially that he is the one who starts to talk about things like that and I even think that its really good because of me being so young and he having more experiences in life and he already have kids so not every guy really wants more after a certain age or is that eager to have anotherone, and that feels nice :) And really nice to have found the one you want to grow old with, the one you want to spend the rest of your life with ♥

(now I'm really getting a bit too far into my private thoughts of my private life haha, so back to the general topic ;)

So after all these neutral or positive things do I even see people going down, having problems.. people hurting each other, expecting to much, lying, intrigues, trying to destroy others life/relationships, and even people who cant handle their lifes and do not know what to do with it.. it hurts when these people are close to you, and you cannot help them or do anything against it, you can just be there, I know that even that is enough sometimes, to just be there. but still..

And I actually really dont have time for all these thoughts but its good anyway.. I like to talk and think about it though, all this are really imoprtant things.. but I have to deal better with time to make everything =P So off to my studies again ;-)

news

Have internet now again, ordered a mobile broadband, the otherone is still not working and I am so sick of it, especially cause they want me to pay anyway -.- yeah whatever...

Skyped with Lisa direclty, was so nice to hear her voice again and I'm so happy to have her by my side. Even if she is so far away does she always stand by my side with advice and lovely words or things that make me laugh when I'm sad =) ♥

oh and this was so amazing yesterday, I drove to my mother for some dinner in the evening and saw the moon on my way, so amazing how orange the moon was :O

And cold outside these days, had around -3* some night ago o.O winter is coming..
Ok back to studying, not really coming anywhere and so much to do before next weeks trip to härnösand. 

the other woman..?

Have been thinking lately because I heard some things and had some things happening around my world lately.. Its this cheating topic.. To be the other woman on a mans side. Why do women do it? How can they stand being the second one? I mean ok, you might have the feeling that you have something that the otherone doesnt but you will never be his, you will never be the first, never the one that he cares most about, he will never leave the first for the second. How can women be satisfied with that? Everybody wants to be the one, you dont want to share, you dont want to be secret, you dont want be treated like that. And if, why? Do they think that they cannot find anyone better? Do they think that its better to have him like this instead of not at all? And even if you can take it-how long can you really take it? Doesnt it hurt to know that there is this other one, the one that obviously really matters to him? The one who gets all of this other things you dont get? The "official" one he showes to everyone as his beloved wife or girlfriend?

I cant understand, it would drive me crazy, it would brake me down to know that. I would want to feel special, I would want to get the feeling of beeing the only one. And if I wouldnt.. is he really worth it then? or just another idiot you met and fell in love with? ok, there are friends with benifits but.. how long could you really take it..? I want my special someone, the one who makes me feel special all the time ♥ and not just when he's got time because he is not spending time with the other one or sth like that..

Love..

is patient 

is kind 
it does not envy 

it does not boast 

it is not proud 

it is not rude 

it is not self-seeking 

it is not casily angered 

keeps no record of wrongs 

does not delight in evil 

rejcices with the truth 

always protects 

always trusts 

always hopes 

always perseveres 

never fails..

Love should be experienced and not just felt. 

I'm better near to you

Finally! Its sunny outside again when I wake up =) so a good start into the weekend =) I woke up, had some breakfast and went to Greger to study there, boring to be home alone and so unnecessary when he's only here on weekend =) So I take every minute I can get with him ♥ Lateron he went to fix some stuff so I stayed home with gabriel, studying a bit.

In the afternoon we went shopping for dinner, wanted to do wok that evening, so chicken, fresh vegetable, nuts and rice. Everybody liked it, so I'm quite satisfied, improving my cooking ;-) Lateron did Joel and marcus come, we were all playing magic, drinking wine and beer. Quite tired after a while did we go to bed then, but I couldnt really sleep that much that night :-/ was not tired either for some stupid reason.. And Gabriel decided to have an early morning ;-)


Didnt really do that much this weekend actually, on saturday did Greger and Joel go through some techniques and I recorded them, som more magic ;) and in the afternoon off to my mothers place. Greger fixed her new sauna and then we had dinner. Finouk was really sweet, she was babysitting Gabriel ;) She followed him everywhere and always watched over him. When he fell asleep in the evening she layed down next to him to protect him, when he started crying in the sleep she tried to calm him down licking his ear, hihi :) cutie.

So, had a funny evening with some wine and dinner of course :) we went home quite late and still not tired, watched some tv but then it suddenly just came up, totally tired =P So quite happy that gabriel decided to sleep untill 11 the next day ;-)
Sunday was soft, went to see Anna for some hour and got all of her clothes she doesnt know how to transport back to poland ;-) so kinda free shopping =P Back home some hanging around and watching greger playing (wait for, you'll never guess =P ) magic ;-) Then time to make some supper and I even tried on the clothes I got from Anna with Becca, listening to queen and dancing around ;-)

Got some really nice stuff, thank you sweet anna ♥
After dinner we were just relaxing on the couch, playing magic and drinking a glass of wine infront of the fireplace, perfect weekend ending :) Off to bed then for some last cudding before its time for a week apart again, actually two :'-(

time is just passing by..

Gosh, on tuesday i complained that time is just not passing by and weekend so far away and now its almost friday and i didnt even do all this stuff i wanted to :-P

My timetable is neither working out that well haha. Most of the time i get out of bed around 10 and start studying after lunch. But i am good, i do study up to 9pm most of the time then, sometimes midnight.

Still it feels like that you just long for the weekend, then its over so quick and then you long again, and during the day you wake up and long for the evening to sleep and have another day passed.. so weeks are just passing by so fast, months, years.. amazing hm. Why is it like that? Why do we not live for the moment and just enjoy?

Aaaanyway, drifting away again :-) life feels quite good now but all that time passing made my studyingtime pass so quick as well and i am done next year :-S time to start to work but i like studying..

Hm. Will see :-) now i say good night, will try to start a bit earlier tomorrow ;-) and then its weekend soon hihi. Miss my <3 as always :-) hard to have him away during the weeks but no money without work. And even if its harder some days, so is missing someone sth good, you appreciate the otherone more i guess.. every time you see becomes more special.. and the feeling to be back in his arms again, see his smile and just be close.. its just wonderful :-)

Night guys! Have a nice weekend :-)

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hard to study..

I mean i really like the time where its getting dark outside again, lukewarm days in te sun with coloured trees and sitting inside in the evening with candles and hot chocolate, cuddling with your beloved infront of the tv...

But this is just annoying! The second week with only rain, you wake up with head ache every morning and then its only grey and wet outside! Really not motivating to study.. :-(

Didnt do much today either, had lunch with ida and then we were just watching SATC and horrormovies..

But please, stop raining! It makes me sick! But i will try to study hard anyway, looking forward to the weekends as always and really hope for some sun

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weekend-time to enjoy instead of studying?

My weekend was quite calm and i spent it most of the time with greger-what a surprise :-P it was rainy and around 13*, the sun only decided to come out some hours on sunday..

On friday.. let me think, so long time ago :-P went to greger and watched him playing a cardgame on playstation called magic, then some studying the last day of the week :-) in the evening did we take gabbe and some wine to sleep at my place.

Gabbe decided to wake up something past 7 on saturday :-P got him some of my old toys to play with and then he was standing infront of the tv with the remote, dancing to some kidsprogram while i made some breakfast. After that another gaming day :-P while gabbe had his nap did i decide to do the same, didnt miss so much and sleeping is something so wonderful :-D becca and i made some dinner then, we could even get our two gamers away from tv and computer to eat sth ;-) after that we watched ice age and played worms togehter with some beer and wine :-) they (well ok, greger :-P) even tortured me, cause my legs hurt like after a really long week of training xD
walked home with spike and it was fullmoon, me like :-) went to bed early, i think the wine was too much ;-)

So for some reason did i sleep quite long on sunday, missed a lot of the short sunny time cause i woke up 11, but had a walk with spike outside :) around 16*, was nice :-) then some cleaning and again no training, where is everybody? :-(
Today greger teached me how to play this cardgame magic, so in the end did we both sit and played it together :-P liked it and its always more fun to do sth together :) sun was gone then, bought some supper and later in the evening (after several maches of magic =P ) did we celebrate johannas birthday with a cake that becca made and some wine, unfortunately did i forget to make a picture, but it was really tasty and looked great :-) even if she worked all day do i hope that we could give you a nice evening :)

All in all a cosy and calm weekend just how i like it :) and now, another studyweek ;)

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mcDreamy?

That guy every girl is dreaming of, the prince on that white horse.. where is he? Will we ever meet him? And that what i wonder is.. do we actually really want him? That perfect guy?

I think we would get quite bored after a while.. nobody is perfect.. and what IS perfect actually? I think its quite dependable of the point of view you have.. and i think too "perfect" would we not be able to handle.. i think you would go crazy after a while having someone around you all the time who is perfect, it would just make you think of the unperfect properties you have yourself..?

So how is the perfect guy actually?
Is it even important what he is like? Isnt it more important thing is how he is to you..? sure, he might should have that standart things like smart, funny, lovely, charming and kinda good looking.. but he should love you the way you are, accept the "negative" things and be there for you..

I might be quite romantic but i guess every girl wants him to be that one who only sees you.. when you look into his eyes you should see that its you he loves, you he wants to spend his future with.. but.. isnt love sth more? Isnt the most important thing that you are always there for each other, that you are always honest and that you always know that he will be there for you the moment you need him most? The one you takes your hand when you're reaching out?

Hmm, this is really hard.. i mean if you watch all these typical love movies you want that guy, but as i said, i dont think you'd stand out with him way too long.. too perfect for a normal human being :)

But isnt finding someone who is perfect only to find someone who is perfect to you? even with his deficiencies.. wait for the one who loves your deficiencies..and dont try to be perfect.. as long as you are yourself, as long as you make your partner feel special and as long as you will stand at his/her side will you be perfect for that one person that is made to be with you.. that one true love that lasts forever <3

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sunday

So here we go, last day of the weekend :) woke up early and was kinda done with a lot of things before 9 :-O so what to do, what to do ;-) not that much actually, studied and watched a movie, then it was actually time for training but it was only me and joel so no training :-(

Went to my neighbour ricke instead, was about time, quite a while ago, his flowers where on their way to die :-P so i was nice and gave them some water :-P

In the evening it was time for dinner again, greger, becca, tobbe and i were invited for dinner at my mothers place, mexican foooood, hmmm :-) unfortunately not that long because he had to fix some stuff and leave for work already today or in the night.. but it was nice anyway :-) got something in my eye though and it doesnt wanna come out :-/

So now cuddling with spike and some tv, tomorrow i will start to study, made my very own timetable ;-) and will try to do things only during the week so i can have weekends free :) so tomorrow, 8-17 i will be a good student studying ;-)

Good night folks and have a nice week :)

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saturday

I will change that with the pics when i've got internet again, but via mobile he just uploads them first :)

Anyway, tired but ready to do sth did i start my day, and i studied o.O on a saturday!! o.O good hm ;-P didnt do that much today, studied and cleaned, thats actually it i have to say.. in the evening did greger and i make tasty dinner, chicken in the oven, rice and currysauce :) romantic candle light dinner with a lot of candles ;-P after that did we watch a movie that we rent, megamind, was funny :) so a cosy evening with a lot of sweets that i was longing for after a week alone in härnösand :) <3

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back home

On friday it was time again to travel homewards again :) had a great week i have to say and math is really funny, looking forward to study now :)

On my way home i had a stop in umeå, greger invited me for a photosession at a place called "the studio" so i got make up, styling and fotoshoot for free :) that was really fun and i feel more and more proofessional now that i did this kinda things more than once, i might become a model instead of a preeschool teacher? :-P most amazing is the stiling i think, i normaly dont use that much make up but it looked really great :) when i finally have internet at home again i will upload some shooting pics :-)

After that my journey continued, arrived at home where i left my new writing desk in my appartment before i left my mothers car to her again and then i got spike and had dinner in good company with greger, tobbe, johanna and gabbe :)

Left another time to get finally home to build up my new writingdesk :-P anna came over as well so we had tea and some girly smaltalk ;-)

After that off to bed to get ready for the weekend :)

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